my last entry for my very loving blog which ppl im sure have come 2 hate especially vampire dude and mr.quiet and everyone else i have insulted in this blog of mine.

first of all,sorrie bcoz i havent been blogging but this is coz my line was busted and everything.

apologies to everyone i hv insulted in my blog and now here this apology entry is just for vampire dude.

hey.im sorrie u had to read that very unfortunate entry where i insulted you and destroyed i assume you're muka and ur dignity and everything.so im terribly sorrie for every entry that i have made u mad and everything.as much as i love you and like how i love and adore all of my friends,i do once in a while get annoyed and mad at them and do things which i regret thanks to my anger.ur not u noe any different from them.as much as i love you more than a friend nothing can b done coz you're...just confused and sad over things.which i dont think i can help you with.as much as i try 2 help my friends i have a limit bcoz i cant help them with everything..and they noe that nobody can help them with everything but i try my best 2 help them with everything coz i love them and cherish them...what about you?i dont noe.but i still just wanted 2 help you and u noe at least make others see you ARE a great person.i dont noe what im doing.

haha anyway im sorrie i hurt you and everything.yes yes as a girl i do hv my diginity and by just typing you this entry,i have crushed my entire dignity as a girl and also wiped my face off my face.which is a good thing coz its so hideous.anyway yeah so i hope you'll b laughing ur ass off now.till then.im sorry,merry christmas and have a better life.

to all the ppl who actually LOVE reading my blog,which i doubt there are any of you,im sorrie but i just wanna close this blog since i cant even bitch in peace here.or anywhere else.so im sorie...if i dcide 2 blog again,i shall type in an entry here.i mean ill close my blog as in ill leave the entries and tag board and leave this page accesible and everything but i wont blog in it anymore.just for the fun of it.hehe...anyway...merry christmas everbody.

love,
ze biatch

im actually....

awake at this time.hahaha!ud only find me awake at this hour if there was school.i did not sleep at all.amazing huh?in fact i even changed and went out with my cousins and aunt n uncle n grandma for breakfast supposingly at jalan imbi,restoran overseas.but however,sadly it has zhap lap zhor.oh well.so we all starved all the way back to restoran summer palace hoping that there wud b at least dim sum over there.however,that stupid lanc good for nothing shop wasnt opened.and it is only opened for business on weekends.yes weekends.how bizzarre is that?!?!?

oh and btw,reading my recent entry,it is spelled as havard i think.=P!sorrie la,no school,bad english.=P!!

anyway i have nothing much 2 talk about bsides i wanna b a lesbian.dont you think thats a good idea?

and now i wish 2 attend my throne coz i think i ate and drank too much at delifrance....oh god...sick in the stomach...

SHITTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!X-(!!!

two times

this is currently my 2nd entry in a day,which dozent shock me.im having severe high blood pressure attacks every 5 minutes.wonder why?read my previous entry.like i said my annoying bratty cousin has dcided 2 land here once again,n i seriously feel like chucking her all the way to a hotel in terengganu.seriously.that would keep her off me for a while.yes for a while.

i read chelle's blog and i guess her recent entry is like true izent it?i mean on christmas month,all of us hint at other ppl on what they want and its the present that matters to them.i mean so what if its only two hersheys tied together with a ribbon and a little card saying,"merry christmas.thank you for a wonderful year.love."it means more than just i-dont-have-enough-money-to-get-you-a-present.i mean it IS a present.its the heart that counts.i remember talking 2 vampire man about christmas and all.he was plannin 2 go 2 genting with his friends since all of em are going n eventho he has no $$$.what an idiot.i told him,why dont you just give em two hersheys tied with a ribbon and give it whole heartedly...?like u noe with a true heart or sumtin...he said, "chiu might as well nonit 2 give liddat!!!"i was fucking pissd off i kept quiet on the phone after that.

there ya go and example of teenagers these days.

ppl these days only bother about the size and price and everything.dont you guys think about the heart?i seriously dont care if i give my friends like just two hersheys for christmas.i honestly wanna get them something expensive and something that they like for christmas if i had the money.but now i dont.and at least i bother getting them something and its from my heart.and theyre gonna eat it.n i hope they smile when they do.

but nobody said im getting you guys chocolates.so u guys wait ni a!=P!

anyway i feel like ciaoing now.with her coming in and out so often i cannot blog/bitch as much as i want.oh god save me.

X-(!!!

heart warming tales of jingx life continues.=P!

                                     

 

Song listening 2 right now : Wo Men De Ai(Our Love)

Artist : F.I.R.

 

Don't ask me when I caught the listening 2 chinese songs bug again.last time I got it was in form 1.

 

But seriously,they are much better than english songs.the meaning is much better…mayb its coz im like some ah lien la but I dunno.sigh.meaninful 2 me right now.

 

I have come 2 realize that u noe vampire man is like some fling.not exactly a fling but its like a come-and-go thing.see like right now,I hv gotten over the dude.like 90%.yet again.its true what my friend told me,my story is even more complicated than a harvard love story.dunno la.hahaha!

 

Now I feel much more stoned and I feel happy that way.i mean I do see him and get things scratching my stomach but oh well.hehe!we're friends.its as far as that.close friends,best friends,god noes.i wud label it as,close friends.nothing more than that for now.its obvious and for good for everybody la that he needs his space and I still need mine.

 

And seriously,whatever I do now with him,no matter how stupid it is,my issue la.aihyz.nobody asked God to make me so liddis.LOL.

 

Anyway right now this is the song I want him to read….it means hell a lot!!

 

Kiss *Because I'm a girl*

-----------------------------------------

Dodeche ar suga obso namjadurui maum

wonhar ten onjego da juni ije tonande

ironjog choumirago nonun 

thugbyorhadanun

gu marur midosso negen 

hengbogiosso

marur haji guresso nega shirhojyoda go

nunchiga obnun nan nur bochegiman hesso

norur yoghamyonsodo manhi guriurgoya

sarangi jonbuin nanun yojainika

modungor swibge da jumyon gumbang

 shirhjungnenunge

namjara durosso thollin mar gathjin anha

dashinun sogji anhuri maum mogo bojiman

todashi sarange munojinunge yoja ya

marur haji guresso nega shirhojyodago

nunchiga obnun nan nur boche giman hesso

norur yoghamyonsodo manhi guriurgoya

sarangi jonbuin nanun yojainika

[narration] Onur urin heojyosso

 budi hengbogharago

noboda johun sarammannagir barandago

nodo darun namjarang togathe nar 

saranghanda go marhanten onjego

sorjighi na nega jar doenungo shirho

naboda yepun yoja manna hengboghage 

jar sarmyon otohge

guroda nar jongmar ijoborimyon otohge

nan irohge himdunde himduro juggenunde

ajigdo nor nomu saranghanunde

sarangur wihesoramyon modun da har su inun

yojaui chaghan bonnungur iyong hajinun marajwo

hanyojaro theona sarangbadgo sanunge

irohge himdurgo oryourjur mollasso

konglish by warghalv

haha I doubt you guys understand korean so here the english version.;)!

Kiss *Because I'm a girl*

--------------------------------------

i just cant understand the hearts of men 

they tell you they want you and 

then they leave you 

this is the first time, you're special 

i believed those words and i was so happy 

you should have told me you didn't 

like me any more 

but i couldn't see that and 

you just rushed me 

although i will curse you i'll 

still miss you 

since i am a girl, to whom love is 

everything 

i heard that if you give up things 

too easily 

to a man, he will get bored with you 

i don't think this is wrong 

a girl says that she will never be

 fooled again 

but she will fall in love again 

you should have told me you didn't 

like me any more 

but i couldn't see that and you 

just rushed me 

although i will curse you i'll

 still miss you 

since i am a girl, to whom love 

is everything 

[narration] 

Hey babe 

the pain 

it's not enough to describe 

how i feel 

we were so happy together 

but i know now 

i've been blind 

you told me that youd never let me down 

whenever i needed you you'd always be here 

i can forgive but i cant forget 

even though you hurt me 

i still love you 

i still love you 

don't take advantage of a girl's

 willingness to do anything for love 

and her caring instinct 

i didn't know that to be born as a girl 

and to be loved was so hard 

although i will curse you i'll 

still miss you 

since i am a girl, to whom love is 

everything 

although i will curse you i'll 

still miss you 

since i am a girl, to whom love is

 everything 

 

there.dont you think its so meaningful?

 

So to all you babes/ladies out there who broke up with someone you really really love whole-heartedly but it wasn't returned during the relationship,and now you guys are still friends,and you still hate the dude yet love him as much,here ya go.something 2 make you stronger with.you are not and I repeat,NOT the only one.

 

=)

 

girl hug!

 

Pfft.anyway.

 

I woke up at 5 2day.hahaha!and I woke up coz I heard that female cousin of mine screaming her way into the house…-.-…great la.i hvta sleep with her.AGAIN.

 

Bsides that im watching king kong this Saturday!woo hoo!!!!bleugh.i dun even wanna watch it.mr.quiet ask me 2 go.god.this is so complicated.he got all mad when I said I went out with vampire dude yesterday.but I only talked 2 him for like 20-30 minutes out of the whole day with my sis.LOL.i already told him im not over vampire dude yet and god he still dozent get it meh tiu…

 

He wantd 2 hate me for it.

 

For some reason at that moment when he said it,I felt like I was the guy instead of the girl who gets all merajoky and I was the one knocking sense into the dude.god.i felt like it was never gonna end.ive got a fair number of humans who already hate and despise me around the world so its ok I wanna try n diminish the number right now.before all of em create one big ass group and murder me.

 

=S.

 

oh well.

 

Bsides that I think im fine now.

 

If u xcuse me,I wanna go play the sims nightlife now.its the only game that makes me feel like all the beautiful dreams can come true….hehe!

 

Im into happy endings!!

 

Oh yea..i havnt typed out my wishlist yet huh?

 

Mayb ill do it now.ehhe!=P!

 

Till then.

 

So hai is signing out.

 

one turn.many more to go.

                  

Ok enuf of crap talk now.haha ive nothing much 2 say.

 

Went out with mr.quiet yesterday.honestly I din wanna go out at all.i hv lost my mood for nearly everything.well anyway I din exactly plan this whole going out with mr.quiet dude.just that sis askd me 2 go out with her.i mean knowing her she’ll b with hers truly and ill b there not being able 2 swallow down my popcorn watching the both of them show their luv.*shudders*that’s like watching some the maid show or something.much,much worse.*gulps*

 

So she dcided 2 call our ever friendly kah chiun,my si fu.sorrie si fu I seriously wasn’t in the mood 2 shop.wantd to get that stupid box and go home.can u bliv just a box and ribbons cost me RM37.40?!?!and so since I was flat broke I dcided 2 use my vouchers.sighh..byebye vouchers.then like walked around with si fu and all.seriously I already told my sister 2 tell u not 2 go wan.coz I was fine walkin by myself and like I din wanna drag u around the mall with a sad ass case like mua.she din want to.sorrie k?anyway yeah walked and then askd for my ipod back from mr.quiet dude.coz vampire man lookd preoccupied with lil-miss-picky.they din noe I was there.hahaa…I love playing spy.=P!

 

Walked walked and he was all grumpy*vampire man when we met up later*.mr.quiet wantd a movie I said ask vampire man he said he watched the fog n all edi n he din wanna ditch his friends.fine.then I went out of 1u with mr.quiet to stone n think.i really wantd 2 cry.then sayang chelly called and we talked and screamed*mind u mr.quiet got kinda scared*and everything.we dcided 2 msg.lol.mr.quiet tot I was msging my bf!!!!which dozent exist right now.hahaha!!then he treated me 2 secret recipe n I think ice lemon tea does something 2 me.coz I ate spaghetti and ice lemon tea and he only had a mocha.and like after that I got high and he was laughing and teasing me and hahaha it was so insane.muahaha hez getting me a pint of baskin robbins the next time we go out.YEAY!hahaha!well anyway that so hai,hahaa iz cool with me and im cool with me which makes everything better.finally,one thing settled.its like a chicken finally laid an egg.phew!

 

I told you I love chickens.L-O-V-E.

 

Well after that I went home laughing my ass off and seriously kenny,id rather kiss my grandma than give you a goodbye-kiss.eww…!!!

 

I hadta sleep with my sis coz my cousins from singapore came up and I hadta give my room 2 them.see how kind I am?however I din sleep.with my sister.god.some stupid woman who needs like the whole bed 2 herself.i wonder how is her future husband gonna survive with her man.my cousins,from singapore,left 4 genting 2day,and like theyre coming back on Tuesday,and im not going to sleep with my sis.im sleeping outside,in the living room.i don’t care.my back hurts.

 

Anyway now im constipated and im gonna add my wish list on your right hand side so check back soon to see whether ive dcided 2 put it on ppl!!

 

Till then.

kisssy!

oh well...=S

if he did love me,he wud hv asked me the moment it happened.

 

And not hestitate.

 

Oh well.

 

This shows huh?

 

stupid stupid stupid jing.

be gentle la fuck you

Im so so so so so so so confused right now.

 

I don’t noe wtf im doing at all.

 

If I eat I think im shitting.

 

If I pee,I think im drinking.

 

If I talk,I think im sleeping.

 

If I sleep,I think im awake.

 

So I guess I like the last one best.

 

If I sleep,I think im awake.

 

I guess it’s the best don’t you?i mean u do whatever you want in ur dreams?everything happens.whatever u want,just keep thinking of it a few hours before u sleep,and ull dream of it.everything is perfect….everything happens…just like that.i guess this is why I never wanna get out of bed at all every morning now…I dream about all the things that I wanna go thru…all the beautiful happy fun crayzee things that will happen…all the right things.no hurtful things.at all.seriously.that is the best.

 

This is I guess for him.

 

Thank you for telling me everything that I needed hear…ive been wanting to hear that for ages…but I gave up halfway thinking you had a better life and I shud just bugger off…mayb if I stuck to that thinking and not this right now,I wudnt b so utterly pathetic.the words you say can just make my heart yours again no matter what you hv done to me in the past.to hurt me or to love me,that is like your wish.its all up to you.i m in no control of what I think or do or say when I am with you.why me?why do you hvta say all these things that Ive been longing to hear for so long and then just dump me like that in the corner of this dirty icky street which I hv gotten out off and had a better life since then?you headed your little sad way off outta mine and I led my way outta yours.why do you hvta tell me everything only when I started to lose feelings…?it was 80%...like im downloading this huge ass software ok..and it was near 2 completion…if there is such a word.=S.then you,like a virus just wiped it all out.nothing cud b done.i got caught by you without warning.without warning.and thanks to you,my “dear”,my life has crumbled down yet again like a huge mountain of apple crumble and someone just sliced it.and I wonder who did the whole honour eh?you did.now I hvta start baking.mayb with cement this time to top it all up.lets just hope im not that weak to let it come down again.which I assume im going to yet again.which I hate.god.

 

God why the fuck are u playing with my life.

 

I noe im rude.sorrie la.pure anger and pain in me.

 

Thank you SO much.

 

I LOVE you.

about today...and the previous

im not gonna say much about my life anymore for its far too boring.even a life of a chicken is better than mine.but lately my life has made a huge turn and im still too shocked for words for what has just happened and im too busy daydreaming.so here it is.my update of my oh-so-wonderful-life.

 

1)work

~I hv started work at penny’s parents place,which is shell station at kayu ara but I hv just stopped due to my very weak lungs.its real fun working there yet tiring.i hv gained laodsa pounds coz I eat a lot.penny’s dad buy us food.everyday.haha very sweet of him kan?anyway ill miss the times I had there…

 

2)health

~like I said my very weak lungs.yes I am still sick.i feel that a chicken leads a better and healthy life than I do.i do not noe why I suddenly love chickens.however I am NOT a fucking pros.all these ppl at the shell station thinks i am one.this weird dude was pumpin his car and like asked my name I said jing xiu he said ok nice name I said thank you.next thing u noe he gets into his car and after I said thank you he opened his car door and calld me and I thought his u noe pumping oil thing wasn’t shut properly.mana tau he gave me a piece of paper with his number on it.wtf?!?!?!anyway back to health,I was forced to stop coz my lungs cudnt take it.aihyz.

 

3)love life

~I wont say much about this.ill shut the fuck up.but its upsie downsie and I hv learned to trust like 2% back.i mean I still love him as stupid as I sound.yes yes I noe ewe chelle chui n all are about to slap me with a boot again but u guys said ud be there for me no matter what and let me make my own dcisions rite..?so yeah…ill do it…again…lol!!!i mean its not like hez asking me but u noe….aiyah complicated shit la.but basically something is happening now which ppl will come to noe next year.=).but im still in shock that he said those things and I actually affected him that badly which u noe only happens 2 me in my dreams with some dream guy.LOL.but its really happening and I really dunno what to say.im starting to fantasize and daydream again like a lala mui and yeah…I still do love him and I feel stupid for it coz it’s the wrong time to now…but I cant help it.neither can he.oh well….complicated shit…but for now my life is going great.not the love life.mayb the love life and both life.=).what can I say?

 

Well basically everything is going ok la..i dun care la…=P!

 

Went to 1u today and I spent a lot…sighhh…

 

Things I bought today which I will punch and feel like punching myself for today :

1)stilla products total RM470.00-I got a free bag worth RM300 and also RM40 u parkson vouchers.

2)radioactive top – 10% - RM45.00

3)necklace from studio 78 – RM20 - after discount

4)christmas present from studio 78 – RM64.00 - after discount

5)skin food eye shadow white – RM24.00

6)two pairs of earring for my cousin and one for me and a ring from girls – RM 18.00 I think

7)two lizard semi-permanent tattoos from dragonfly – RM 4.00 after discount.*god the guy is cutE!his name is ten shin!!!!*

8)roxy wallet – RM74.00 after discount

 

I think that’s all…but I hv so little left in my wallet…sighhh…

 

Anyway that’s it la.oh yeah…eventho its fucking late…

 

Dear ewe,

 

We met each other in form 1.we din talk or anything just stared at each other.i stamped the word bitch on you without even knowing you.i got 2 noe you in form 3 and I thank god for it!u are by far the most unique person ive ever met.from clothes to personality to looks to perfection,I can say u hv nearly everything.you hv a way to make someone laugh at the hardest of times and I love you for it.you have a way to say the sweetest things at times to me when I need 2 hear it and I love you like crayzee for it.you have a way to make me and drag me into laughing for no reason and I love you like hell for it.and I thank god that I hv met this very special person in this life of mine.im sorrie ive done all the bad things 2 you but I want u to noe that I never mean it…im sorrie ive hurt you and made u feel mad and angry and all and im really sorrie…but on december 3^rd,b the happiest person you can be because on this very special day,god and ur mom gave life to you.ho yee wa.

 

Bottomline,I love you ewe and thank you for everything!!!!

 

Muahkxx!!

 

::xoxo::

 

~thank you everybody for making my birthday a great one.i love you guys ever so much.thankyou for the entries chelle n ewe!!=D!muahkzzzz!!!!thank you ash for sneaking out just to see mee!!muahkxxxxx!!!thank you liz for fightin 2 wish me first!!and all u babes who msgd and remembered my birthday!!ill try 2 upgrade my memory space.hehe!muahkxxxx!!!!~

about that day.